Just now I read Balroop Singh’s poem ‘A Journey’, at her blog Emotional Shadows.
At first I took it as a simple poem. Then as I re-read her poem and dissected it, there started a whole thought process in my mind.
Reading her lines…she says she’s robbed of certain things.
You have always robbed me
Of my happiness, my triumph
Weakened my strength, my confidence
Rubbished my care, my concern
Hurt my most cherished memories
Being robbed is a strong feeling. It’s not easy to say that. We can only be robbed of something that we once possessed, and here in her case it’s happiness, care, confidence (in people? In herself?). People for whom we cared too much have ‘rubbished’ this care by shutting themselves off, and this hurts only because these people were different, probably they too cared once upon a time but now ‘indifferent’ towards us.
Her love can’t reach that person anymore but still she’s willing to absorb his/her incredible indifference.
‘My love can’t reach there anymore
Your incredible indifference
Could reach me… I’ve absorbed it.’
Distanced hearts. Family members change. Friends change. Overall the hurt is always about first having something that assured a lot of happiness and then losing it altogether; a total sense of loss – not material but that of time and emotions spent. Life spent.
But Balroop has found a path out of all this. A ‘flight of fantasy’, a ‘detachment’, as she enters her own ‘exotic realm’, embarking her own journey. Once again, a question of ‘flight’ also arises only if we were stuck or too involved in a particular situation for long, often at the cost of overlooking other things or people. Likewise, we can only be ‘detached’ from those people, situations or relations with whom we were too attached once.
Overall, I would say this process is eventually liberating. It may seem as if this liberation comes with a price…that of losing the object of your care, love, concern and attachment. But liberation also brings this ‘light’ which, as Balroop says, seems ‘strange’ at first. But that’s because you are not used to seeing things differently. One corner of your heart wishes to remain stuck in the previous wallowing situation. Because letting go of this sentimentalism will also mean letting go of the person of our focus and love.
Finally, we either let go, or forgive them for not caring for us as much as we do. Which also means thereafter we may end up loving them unconditionally, thus accepting whatever little attention they give or do not give.
I am immersed in a strange light
Streaming through me
Sending the waves of forgiveness
Spreading the message of love
Unconditional…absolute.
Thus, if previously they were the only ones who had changed, now finally we too have changed. With this change of focus, now our love will also be no more fixated on these few people who demanded and consumed our life. Our love and care is now meant to be shared with many different people, whosoever needs it more. That is enlightenment.
I feel, as we grow older, we learn these lessons within our families and friends. I do not know what exactly Balroop was talking about, and which particular relations – possibly children, family, siblings, beloved; in fact it can be anyone and during any phase of life. We all encounter these people who have intentionally or unintentionally changed thus compelling us to change as well; albeit positively as we learn to carve our own self-sufficient happiness that’s not dependent on others.
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See how I wrote and wrote. That’s typical of Balroop’s work. It may or may not bombard you at the outset but it’s thought-provoking. Her every post is full of thoughts that apply on everyday lives of each one of us. It may even seem like we already know (from experience) what she’s saying. Yes we do, and still we don’t. Even if we do, she compels us to think and re-think, while healing some of the inner wounds. Pick up a random post from her site and be enlightened. I know her only via blogging world and since then have gained some insights.
The views in this psot were meant to be left as comments, as a response to her actual poem. But it became very lengthy so I posted it here.
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My above thoughts on my fellow bloggers’s penultimate post seem appropriate for The Daily Post’s current prompt Companionable